Living in Shadow: Diary of Syaoran by Sakura
by Rosabell
Summary: Guess what! I found this story! Remember I deleted all my stories once? And then I couldn't find them? I found this one! Yay! But...I forgot what it's about...( I'm so embarrassed!)


" Living in Shadow: Diary of Syaoran" by Sakura

Prologue

My name is Sakura.  
But I'm not the most powerful sorceress in the world.  
This statement might be uncalled for, but you'll see why.

My name is Sakura. Sakura Kinomoto. I am the Card Mistress, master of the Sakura cards, which uses the power of my star. Or, at least I thought it was mine. I use to be the most powerful sorceror. But now, I am no longer so strong.

My strength went with Syaoran.

The story I write here, is about Li Syaoran. My dearest friend, my hope and my love. Though he never knew until too late, until I was too late, I loved him, and I still do. And this alone, cannot be ignored.

My story begins when his is near its end, in the school called Tomoeda Elementary. There, my friend, Tomoyo, had began the day, greeting me, remarking what a beautiful day it was. Syaoran wasn't there until I came, and although his bookbag was there, I wondered if he was absent. 

When he did come, he asked me if I slept well-the usual. Following him was Eriol, who I thought was very interesting in the fact he managed to stick beside Syaoran kun without him glaring at him.   
" Hai, I had a nice sleep. See, I'm not late."  
" Daijoubu. Sakura, can I ask you a favor?" Syaoran asked.  
" Hoe? What is it?" I asked. _Anything you want._ I secretly thought.  
" I want to borrow the Sakura cards for a night." He answered.  
" Sure. Why?"  
" Well, I wanted to test something." He seemed uncomfortable about it, so I didn't push him.  
" I will, if we can sneak past Kero-chan." I giggled.  
Syaoran didn't take the humor. " Can you just try?"  
" Sure. I will." I answered.

One of the reasons Syaoran decided to do it then, was because I had fallen in love, or thought I did. In truth, I didn't even think it, but it was close enough. Eriol was sweet. Kind. Not like Syaoran. He was very attractive.

But I didn't turn away because of what happened. I turned away because I finally realized who Syaoran really was.

Eriol walked me home that day, and I reminded myself to bring the cards. Kero chan was eating pudding. Oni-chan was watching him with a dull blank look that he usually does every since he remembered what Kero was. I ignored them both and succeeded in sneaking the Sakura Book into my bookbag.

The next day I went to school early again, and Syaoran-kun was already there. He smiled a little when I took out the book, and I handed it to him. Eriol came in, and I kissed him on the cheek in greeting, while Eriol kissed me back. We sat in our seats. Syaoran slipped the magic book into his bookbag and nothing was said of the matter.

The next day, he was gone. He was absent, to be truthful, but I didn't worry much. He was probably testing the cards. The next day, he was gone again. I started to worry then. Finally, after he disappeared for a week, I went with Tomoyo-chan and Eriol-kun to his apartment.

A lady opened the door to the lobby for us, so we didn't find out then. We rode up the elevator to Syaoran's floor and rang the doorbell, but no one answered. Ringing again, Kero popped out of my bag saying ' the gaki stole it!'

But I knew Syaoran would never do such a thing. He was probably out.  
He wasn't. I took my key, and it transformed into the same shape as the lock. Then I turned it.

The door opened. The living room was neat and clean, although dust have been gathering. In the kitchen, plates were washed bright and shiny. The floor was a little dirty because of the gathering of dust, and so were the rugs. We called Syaoran's name, but there was no answer.

I went into the rooms without taking off my shoes. This is getting ridiculous. Had he really run off with the cards? But his clothes were here, the furniture, the bookbag, even the robes and the-

Sword! Where is the sword?

I ran into the bedroom, and then I froze. Upon the wall, lay two swords-one the sword card, the other, the chinese traditional sword. Syaoran lay across the floor, as if he fainted, but I knew he didn't, even though I hoped so. I froze for a minute.

Tomoyo came to my side and gasped. Eriol did too, but he said nothing. Neither of them spoke.

The swords. They had blood stains on them.

The floor. There were dried puddles.

Syaoran.

" Syao-syao-syaoran?!" I cried, rushing over to him. It had finally dawned on me what he had been doing. " Syaoran! Syaoran-kun!"

I started to sob. I sob and cried. But even as I cradled his body, Syaoran never moved, never hugged me back the way he did when I was crying about being rejected by Yukito. Yukito-san. Syaoran-kun.  
" Syaoran!" Tomoyo and Eriol took him from me. But we all knew it was too late.

I sobbed. I wailed and cried, and Eriol couldn't do anything to comfort me, and neither could Tomoyo.

_All fear is the fear of loss, and only through that loss, can there be true love._

I knew it too well! I knew that too well! I know it too well, for here he was, lost forever. I cried. I found out what it was like without him again. Empty and lost. But no matter how much I cried, he never woke up, never spoke, never was found again. 

  
  
  
  



End file.
